Skunked At The Skunk Hunt Part III

We all remained perfectly still as the officer approached our car and began inspecting it with his flashlight. Luckily we had taken the beer and guns with us, but we still weren't sure how we were going to explain what we were doing. We all decided to hold tight and see what happened next.

Our hope was that the police officer would simply run our tags and go on with his patrol. The officer returned to his car, but didn't move from his post on the other side of the gate. After about fifteen minutes, we decided that we needed to “bite the bullet” and go talk to him.

Just as we were about to make our move we saw another vehicle approaching down the maintenance road.  This one was a large SUV, also from the City of Florence Police department. This officer repeated the routine of inspecting our tactical Camry with his flashlight. After some brief discussion, the two officers returned to their respective cars and sat in idle patience.

This time we all decided it would be best if we talked to them. Chad and I left the comfort of our hide in the brush, and approached the car of the officer closest to the gate. We were about ten feet from the back of the first car when the officer in the SUV spotted us and jumped out of his vehicle.

“Hold it right there! Get your hands against the vehicle!”  The guy screamed.

I can’t say that I was surprised by his reaction, seeing two guys walk out of the dark wearing full camouflage.  It didn’t take long for the second cop to jump out either. 

“What the hell are you guys doing out here?” said the second cop, asking the million dollar question.

That’s when Chad came up with what ended up being a million dollar answer.

“Hello officers, I actually work here at the golf course, and my supervisor said it would be ok if we came out after dark to play capture the flag. You see, it’s a game we've been playing since we were kids and, we didn't want to disturb anyone in town.”

It seemed like an eternity had passed before the second officer replied to our obvious excuse for being there.  He knew we weren't telling the truth, but was going to give us the benefit of the doubt. He had another surprise up his sleeve for us.

“Ok, well, we will just need you guys to come up here to the club house. The course supervisor is on his way out here and he can confirm that for us.”

“…….Shit!” We both thought to ourselves.

We explained to them that we still had two friends out in the field somewhere,  needed to go get them. Leaving the beer, guns, and other gear in the field, Karen and Trailer joined us in the back of the patrol car.

They drove us up to the club house where we waited for another eternity for the supervisor to show up and sentence us to certain arrest, jail time, and execution from our families and girlfriends.

After about twenty minutes the supervisor showed up. By this time it was about 2:00am and he was not entirely thrilled about being called out of bed.

The officers spoke with him for a while, and then asked Chad to come over while the rest of us waited in the back of the patrol cars. Finally, Chad and the officer came back and got back in the vehicle.

“Well, it looks like you guys are off the hook. I’m taking you back to your car. I want you guys to go home and not come back out here.” Said the officer looking back at us through the cage that all police cars have.

He returned us to our vehicle. Relieved, we hopped back in the Camry and took off. It turned out that the supervisor was not the guy Chad had arranged the hunt with, but he knew Chad was a good guy and didn't say anything to the cops.

Although we didn't get to hunt skunks that night, we also didn’t go to jail. A fair trade I think. But before we went home there was still one problem. Our guns and gear were still in the field at the end of the dead end road, and the cops weren't leaving. We had to get them back. We had to get them back, before the cops found them…

-To Be Continued

Skunked At The Skunk Hunt Part II

Having briefed me on the mission details, Chad and I agreed to commence “operation skunk” on the upcoming Friday evening after the golf course closed for the day. I knew that if this mission was going to be successful, I needed a support team. So I called on my two cousins, Karen and Traylor. We all agreed to meet at Chad's house in Florence. 

That Friday, in the living room of Chad's apartment, we inventoried our gear to make sure we had everything we needed. Our inventory included:

• 3 - .22 caliber rifles
• 100 rounds - Conical Ball Cap Low Velocity .22 Rifle Ammo
• Full camouflage dress for all four people
• 2 - 1,000,000 candle power spot lights
• 1 - night vision monocular 
• 1 - hand held gps receiver
• 4 - hand held flash lights
• 1 - 30-pack Bud Light

We loaded our gear and jumped into Chad's tactical issue Toyota Camry, and drove to the staging area. 

The golf course sat just below a lake dam. It had a main drive that ended at the club house, which then turned into a dead end, gravel, and maintenance road. The maintenance road went around the back side of the course, ending at an adjacent field next to the course’s maintenance building. 

The plan was to drive to the end of the maintenance road. Then use Chad's key to open the locked gate that kept people from driving back to the maintenance building. We would then hide the car in the maintenance building, borrow a couple golf carts, and use the carts to locate and destroy the skunks. 

Just after nightfall, we drove to the end of the road, and unlocked the gate. However just as we began to pull the car through, we noticed headlights coming down the road! In a rush to remain unseen, we quickly shut off the car, locked the gate, unloaded our gear, and dove into the surrounding brush.

It seemed like an eternity as we waited for the car to creep down the gravel road toward our location. Our hearts almost stopped as we saw the car pull up and stop on the road less than fifty yards from where our car was parked on the other side of the gate.

Through the darkness we saw shadows move in front of the headlights. Then we heard the sound of laughter as four teenagers begin to set off fireworks. Breathing a sigh of relief, we grabbed our gear and started back toward our car. We were nearly back to our vehicle when Karen yelled, “Get down, here comes another car!”

Sure enough, down the lane came yet another vehicle, but this one was driving much faster than the first one had. Also seeing the other vehicle, the teenagers extinguished their fireworks, threw their beer bottles into the ditch, and peeled out of there like there was no tomorrow!

As the teenager’s car sped past the oncoming vehicle we were able to read “City of Florence Police Department” on the side. The cop quickly began to turn around to pursue the teenager’s vehicle when his headlights shined on our tactical Camry parked on the other side of the fence. The golf course side of the fence…The wrong side of the fence.

-To be continued…

Skunked At The Skunk Hunt.

Disclaimer: Names and locations have been changed to protect the innocent. For our purposes, we will name the three people involved (besides myself) Chad, Karen, and Traylor. We will also call the name of the town in which Chad worked, Florence.

The year was 2004 and I was living in Pittsburg, working as the front desk guy at my aunt's tax office, while attending college. One day I got a call from my friend Chad wanting to know if I was available for a very special mission that weekend. As a guy who hates to miss special missions,  I asked him about the specifics. 

For a few months, Chad had been working at a golf course in Florence on a maintenance crew. Lately his job had become very daunting, due to the infestation of a wild and particularly ferocious gang of skunks. It appeared that the skunks had claimed the delicate fairways and greens of this particular golf course (and many others) as their own personal foraging grounds. As creatures of the night, the skunks were not a direct problem to golfers or the the course personnel. The problem lay with how the skunks find their food. Night after night, they dug dozens of holes in the plush, maintained grass of the course.These holes were having their toll on the tired maintenance workers who had to repair them every day.

It was clear to the management of the golf course that something had to be done about these creatures that din't discriminate between rough pastures, and well manicured fields of leisure. In disgust, the grounds superintendent said that he wished someone would come out there at night, and kill the skunks once and for all! 

Then a phone call was placed that set forth an unforeseen chain of events.

Chad explained to his boss that he had a friend that possessed a very particular set of skills. Skills that he had acquired over many years. Skills that made him a nightmare for nocturnal beasts such as these. 

The grounds supervisor was quite interested in the use of force to remove these vermin. However, he was very clear that if this mission were to proceed, it could not be sanctioned by himself, the golf course, or anyone affiliated with the organization. Indeed, in any official regard, this mission had to remain top secret. This mission had to remain off the books. This mission had to remain......."Black". 

It was just the kind of mission Chad knew I would accept. 

-To be continued